I haven’t really been focused since, when? I don’t know, October? Yeah, it’s been about that long. Spurts of ambition and motivation…that have sputtered out as soon as they’ve arrived: In and out. Mostly out.
I’m really not a NYE Resolution type of gal. Why commit to something that I know I will not follow through with? Because it’s so much fun to flog myself with a guilty paddle after I fall short? I wish I could say yes…
Burnt out on losing days to dirty sweats and, the all too familiar, mindless hours on Facebook…as the creative clock ticks away from me. Further and further away. I’m back to square one: Growing increasingly bored with myself.
I haven’t been feeling well. You know, like ‘not-right-in-the-head’ kind of not feeling well. I guess I would have to say my health isn’t the best…not just mentally, but I’ve been lacking in the self-care department for a long time. Energy level is at an all time low…smoking too much and sitting too much, etc.
I thought about deleting my Facebook account, but I’ve come to use it as networking and marketing tool. It’s proven to be a great venue.
As I write out what I’m feeling…I’m beginning to see what I need to do. I want to start liking my life…instead of liking everything from sitting in front of the little screen.
I didn’t make this move to New Orleans to fall back into old unproductive patterns: I could have stayed in Portland that. Ready to clear my head, shake out the dust and get back to focusing on my living my life.